The Celtics just… honestly, I don’t even know what that was.
That was one of the least enjoyable basketball games I have ever had the displeasure of experiencing. I wish I could say that I “watched” it transpire, but that 48 minute disasterclass felt more like I was coming down with smallpox than watching a basketball game, slowly dying inside as the Los Angeles Clippers—a team that the Celtics clobbered by 37 on the road in December—continued their onslaught.
When our wonderful Adam Taylor had to call me off the bench for tonight’s 10 Takeaways for the second time this season, I was excited. This is a good team coming to Boston for what should be a competitive game, with lots of interesting and useful takeaways to speak of. Instead, that happened.
It was wall-to-wall failure, complete with all the trappings of a disastrous Celtics loss. Horrible three point shooting? Check. Poor decision-making and discipline? You got it. Worst percentage from the field all season? Book it.
Only once the Clippers removed their starters could the Celtics bench do their darnedest to make the final score look as respectable as possible, shaving it down to a bad-but-not-comically-bad 115-96 defeat. But this one should go in the record books as a 50 point loss, as if both teams played it through, it might have even been worse.
I sincerely hope that you—valued reader of CelticsBlog—were unable to watch last night due to a scheduling conflict, as there was approximately zero fun to be had. But if you’re like me and tuned in all the same, here are 10 painstaking takeaways.
1. The Celtics are not a Finals team without Kristaps Porzingis
Tonight exposed by far the Celtics’ biggest weakness: Kristaps Porzingis’ left ankle. Or knee. Or Lisfranc joint, whatever that even is.
Without Porzingis, the Celtics are liable to get blown off the face of the Earth by great teams, something the Clippers just announced themselves as. A bad defensive matchup suddenly has no curveball, and an unlucky shooting night can snowball into a bona fide catastrophe.
This is a terrible possession, reminiscent of the worst habits of past Celtics teams. It’s a tunnel vision drive with 21 seconds on the shot clock into the chest of a defender with better positioning, and will remind fans of some of the worst games of Jaylen Brown’s career. These are game-killers, liable to give your opponent a free stop and transition opportunity and make your teammates wonder what the heck you’re even doing.
But Brown has managed to avoid most of those bad habits all year, primarily because he has an automatic safety valve in Porzingis. Possessions like these don’t kill an entire game when the Celtics can get a free good shot out of a pick and roll. Kawhi Leonard and Paul George were shutting down everything the Celtics had on the perimeter, but I don’t think Mason Plumlee and Daniel Theis would have had any chance against Porzingis’ size.
In short, Porzingis simply wouldn’t have allowed Brown and others to continue their self-destructive tendencies. He doesn’t just add a layer to the offense as he turns it from a single boring slice of unfrosted vanilla cake into a delicious, buttercream frosted multi-layer chocolate-strawberry-raspberry marble cake.
The Celtics are the best team in the league with Porzingis but not near good enough without him. How much would you bet on him getting to the finish line?
2. Deep breath
Ok, that was the main takeaway, so we’ll be using the second slot here to take a collective mental health break. Whoever you are, please stop reading and take four deep breaths, I’ll do the same.
Next, we’re going to do some affirmations:
It is going to be okay. This is not going to derail the entire season. Porzingis will be back. The Celtics were never going to go 40-1 at home. We are a strong and capable team. Luke Kornet’s haircut looked good.
Lastly, here’s a royalty-free picture of a puppy to cheer everyone up:
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