Arnold Schwarzenegger makes raunchy jokes about sex, prostitution after customs detention

Arnold Schwarzenegger made it through Munich customs with a few new jokes under his belt.

The “Terminator” star attended an auction in Kitzbuhel, Austria, on Thursday where he auctioned off a luxury watch that he reportedly failed to declare Wednesday at the Munich airport, leading him to be briefly detained.

Schwarzenegger, 76, kicked off auction with a stand-up comedy routine about the incident, as seen in a video obtained by TMZ.

“I mean, we always start things with a lot of drama. That’s what we saw yesterday. I mean, can you believe that all of a sudden I was in handcuffs?” he asked.

The former governor of California told attendees that the cuffs weren’t “because of the watch or the customs office” but instead from “a hot night” with his girlfriend, Heather Milligan, 48.

“It’s unbelievable. No, but seriously, the woman in the customs office said, ‘If you don’t behave I’m going to put you in handcuffs,’” he told an uneasy crowd.

Arnold Schwarzenegger poses during the event “Special Dinner for Climate Action” on the byline of the FIS ski alpine world cup in Kitzbuehel, Austria on Jan. 18, 2024. APA/EXPA/AFP via Getty Images

“And I said, ‘Hey, that’s okay. That’s a great deal because usually I pay $500 for that,’” he quipped.

Schwarzenegger proceeded to rave about the “very special” $100,000 Audemars Piguet that was in his luggage and was up for auction, and claimed customs agents also searched his bag for a second timepiece.

“He couldn’t find it because I was hiding it,” he joked. “And I can’t tell you where because I just cannot sit down today.”

A close-up of Schwarzenegger’s watch that was up for auction. WireImage
Schwarzenegger pictured in Munich customs.

The Post has contacted reps for Schwarzenegger for comment.

An insider told TMZ that the “Escape Plan” actor dazzled the audience with stories about the experience for around eight minutes.

The whole experience was seemingly worth it though as the watch reportedly sold for $293,000, per the outlet.

Arnold Schwarzenegger holds his Audemars Piguet watch. FilmMagic

An insider told Page Six that the former body builder was “never asked to fill out a declaration form and he answered every question from customs officers honestly” once they would the piece.

“He cooperated at every step even though it was an incompetent shakedown, a total comedy of errors that would make a very funny cop movie,” the source added.

He was reportedly released after a three-hour conversation about how he could pre-pay potential taxes on the watch.

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