Apple’s car is dead, after ten years of it being an extremely real thing that was absolutely going to happen and totally change the automotive world. This wasn’t going to be any major loss to us enthusiasts, until we learned one key piece of information: It was going to be a van.
Vans rule, and losing one feels like a blow to the enthusiast world. Sure, none of us likely could’ve afforded that gullwing-doored van, but it would’ve been a neat thing to see through the windows of our aging shitboxes. But, learning about Project Titan’s vanhood so late in the game, folks like moistened bint can’t help but wonder what else we missed:
An electric van seems like a genuine help to the Mystery Inc. gang. Think about all the times they need to move around quietly so as not to disturb ghosts, ghouls, or real estate developers — EV silence would be a boon. Granted, I’m not sure the whole autonomy thing would go all that well. I’m sure the van would find a way to get cursed.
Congratulations, moistened bint, on another Comment Of The Day win. Here’s a straight up Scooby-Doo track, which sounds a lot less Halestorm and a lot more Fleetwood Mac than I remember. It’s even presented in a lovingly dated misspelled YouTube lyric video. They just don’t make ‘em like this any more.