WHERE would Rangers be without James Tavernier?
Well, since the start of 2015-16, Rangers have scored 1,028 goals of which he has either scored or set up 250.
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Let those numbers percolate for a moment.
Take in the fact he’s been involved in pretty much one in four across league, cups and Europe.
That’s a record any No 9 or No 10 in the business would be well happy with.
But for a man with No 2 on his back?
Well, he got it bang on at the weekend when he described his contribution as crazy.
When he put away the opener in a 3-1 win over Hibs that helped return Philippe Clement’s side to the top for 24 hours, it also made him the highest-scoring defender in British history with 131 career strikes, 122 of them coming since he arrived in Govan.
And in this week of all weeks, as the Old Firm prepare to put everything on the line, I can’t help wondering for the umpteenth time how different things might have panned out had Tavernier been the kind of defender who signed up with the intention of just defending.
Would they have won the league in 2021?
Would they have gone on to reach the Europa League final the following year?
Would they have come off defeat in that one to win the Scottish Cup?
Would they have lifted this season’s League Cup?
Would they, for that matter, be this close to their greatest rivals this late in the season?
Yet, even with Celtic being so bang ordinary, you would have to say no to most or all of the above.
Because when you unpick each of those campaigns, you find so many crucial goals that Tavernier’s banged away or laid on a plate for others.
The latter stages of that astonishing run to Seville are the perfect example.
He scored four across two legs against Dortmund in the last 32, one at home to Red Star in the last 16, two against Braga in the quarters and one at home to Leipzig in the semis.
Any striker does that and their value would be zooming up into the tens of millions.
He notched 19 in the season when they stopped ten in a row.
It was his 76th-minute strike that won this season’s first piece of silverware against Aberdeen at Hampden in December, just as his double saw off Hearts in the semis.
Now he goes into Sunday’s showdown having put away 22 in 48 appearances this season.
And would anyone be the least surprised if he had a big say in how the table looks once it’s all over? Course not.
And that’s because he is to Rangers what Callum McGregor is to their rivals across the city.
They’re twin talismans, guys who make everyone feel so much more settled just knowing they’re around.
Or, maybe more to the point given what’s unfolded these past few weeks for both Celtic and Scotland, everyone feels that bit more jittery when they’re not around.
McGregor’s injury left a huge hole both in the midfield for club and country, but also in the sense of calm and control both enjoy when he’s fit.
You can bet your house on McGregor leading the champions out of the tunnel and into a cauldron where all Celtic will have for company is each other.
His presence alone will make the other players in that lonely away dressing room feel a couple of inches taller.
To have a player that influential around must be amazing. To know that, when you’re in a tight spot with the enemy closing in, he’ll always be there to dig you out must make the heart rate drop by a dozen beats.
Everyone at Rangers must get that same sense of everything being all right when Tavernier’s stomping up and down the right flank.
Knowing that when they need a goal, he’ll somehow pull one out of nowhere.
Knowing that if you get into the right position in the box, he’ll find you with a better cross than any winger.
For me, McGregor is the better footballer of the two simply because I can’t see a glaring weakness in his game.
Tavernier, on the other hand, can be exploited defensively, as Celtic have done plenty times.
The lapses of concentration, the inconsistent positional sense that drags him into traffic and leaves space behind are what have stopped him bagging a big move elsewhere.
If you were scouting on his attacking prowess alone, he’d be worth fortunes.
Still, whatever fee Rangers might have got for him, you get the feeling Tavernier’s 250 goals and assists across nine rollercoaster years have probably been worth more in terms of income from Europe, sponsorship and more.
And if he squeezes out a couple more specials that help settle this title race in their favour? Well, some might even call him priceless.
ANY other weekend of the season, Celtic’s first goal at Livi would have been a blooper video all of its own.
First defender falls over his own feet trying to dribble out of the box.
Second one smashes the loose ball into third defender’s face.
Keeper saves a shot in the scamble, only for the rebound to hit fourth defender on the chest and trickle in.
Comedy gold, unless you’re Livi gaffer Davie Martindale.
But this wasn’t just any weekend — this was the weekend of THAT Hibs free-kick.
One which I can honestly admit to have watched 100 times, minimum.
Nectaris Triantis tries to bomb it long and early.
It smacks his skipper Joe Newell flush in the puss from five yards, then rebounds behind the taker and poleaxes Will Fish.
Seriously, the physio shouldn’t have been coming on to treat them with a magic sponge. He should have used a soda syphon.
And I’m currently trying to confirm rumours that the team bus broke down on the M8 because the radiator ran out of custard .
AS someone with a huge amount of trust in Steve Clarke, here’s hoping he’s right about Scotland’s current form slump.
As in, we’re just s**** at friendlies.
From the bottom of my heart, I really do hope so.
I want to believe that if we’d needed to beat Georgia and Norway in our last two qualifiers, we would have.
I genuinely want him to be right when he shrugs off Tuesday’s defeat to Northern Ireland as nothing more than part of a process leading to the Euros.
After all, he knows his players best. So maybe he’s aware that they need pressure and jeopardy before they’re able to get themselves properly up for it.
Maybe he’s 100 per cent confident that come June we’ll see a tighter, slicker, smarter side than we have since we sealed our place.
Because if not…nah, let’s not even go there.
Let’s put our faith in Clarke and a terrific group of players. Let’s hope we get Callum McGregor and Aaron Hickey back in time.
And maybe, just maybe, throw in an extra wee prayer that a lethal goalscorer turns up at SFA HQ any day now, waving his Paisley-born granny’s birth certificate.
WHEN Ryan Shanley made it seven with 14 minutes to go at Links Park on Saturday night, it was Falkirk’s 100th goal of the season.
What a perfect way to put the seal on a remarkable title triumph.
Across 41 games in four different competitions, they’ve lost just three.
In the league, John McGlynn’s men remain The Invincibles. Played 31, won 25, drawn six, lost hee-haw.
Their 81 points see them 19 clear of Hamilton with five games to go and that 7-1 romp at Montrose showcased just how much better than the rest they’ve been.
Yes, the five years they’ve spent in League One have probably been four too many given their status.
But now they’ve finally got back out of the third tier, every Bairn out there must feel magic to have seen their team do it in such style.
As for those fans themselves? Let’s just say few supports in the land deserve success more than they do because of their remarkable loyalty during such barren times.
Their home gates held up around the 4,000-odd who were turning up in the Championship six years back.
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Could they hit the ground running in August and go straight up again? It will be fascinating finding out.
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